Many adults have experienced having someone believe in them more than they believe in themselves, according to Janette Wheat, Ph.d, of the University of Arkansas at Pine Bluff.
“This most likely makes them feel empowered as if they can take on the world,” said Wheat, a professor and Cooperative Extension Program human development and family studies specialist.
During Heart Month, she says she agrees with Dennis Trittin, author of “What I Wish I Knew at 18” and “Parenting for the Launch,” that believing unconditionally in someone is one of the most powerful ways to demonstrate love.
Wheat said that most successful people can point to their parents’ or guardians’ beliefs in them as one of the driving forces behind their successes. In her case, she is grateful for her parents’ and grandparents’ unconditional love and belief in her.
Wheat said it is a tremendous asset for youth to be surrounded by adults who believe in them and who can affirm their uniqueness and value. And, what a better time to do this than Heart Month?
Independent reporting for Pine Bluff & Jefferson County since 1879.
“Parents and teachers should encourage children to dream big and persevere through life’s challenges,” she said. “Children or students will make their share of mistakes along the way but having unconditional acceptance and belief from an adult softens those blows and provides a safety net they can always count on.”
Wheat offers suggestions from Trittin that show ways to let youth know they are valued:
• Write a note and put it in their lunchbox or backpack; or if a teacher, put a sticky note on one of their assignments or tests.
• Be generous with your time.
• Be upfront. Whether at a meal, during tutoring or after class, tell them you believe in them and why. Mention some of their greatest assets. Don’t just compliment them for their achievements. Appreciate their qualities and compliment them when they do kind deeds.
• Let them hear you compliment others.
• Speak from experience. Share a bit of your downfalls and mistakes of life experiences.
— Carol Sanders is a writer/editor with the UAPB School of Agriculture, Fisheries and Human Sciences.