MENTAL HEALTH QUESTIONS – #5 (July 22nd)
Q. We have a 7-year-old daughter who is very dramatic. Sometimes when she is angry with us, she will say “I wish I were dead” or “How would you like it if I killed myself?” We usually respond by saying “We love and care about you very much, but you must still obey us.” We don’t think these threats are real, but we don’t want to overlook a problem. What are your suggestions?
A. These types of threats are fairly common in children who are inclined to be dramatic. However, since it is better to take precautions when someone of any age makes a suicide threat, I suggest that you have her evaluated by a child psychologist. A mental health professional can help her learn more acceptable ways to manage her anger and to self-regulate her emotions. The psychologist can also work with the family on developing techniques to deal more effectively with her “dramatic” outbursts. As parents, you will feel more assured if she has an evaluation and the psychologist explains to her why these threats are inappropriate.
Q. My grandson, who is 9, was recently diagnosed with Asperger’s Syndrome. I always thought he was autistic. He has difficulty with speech, coordination, and does not seem able to form an attachment to either his mother or me. Since I am the one who takes care of him, I want to know more about Asperger’s.
A. Asperger’s Disorder or Syndrome is similar to autism in many ways, but children with Asperger’s usually have considerably more functional skills. The symptoms of Asperger’s can range from mild to severe which is one of the difficulties in diagnosing the condition. Children with Asperger’s generally have normal intelligence even though there may be difficulty with language skills and motor development. You may have noticed that your grandson has difficulty with social skills and maintaining friends. Friendship problems arise because the child with Asperger’s often has peculiarities in speech patterns such as talking in a monotone voice or in “rapid-fire” speech. They can engage in long, one-sided conversations without noticing that the other children have lost interest or are making fun of them. Many children with Asperger’s do not have an understanding of others’ emotions and often have an inability to empathize with either their peers or adults. This lack of social skills can make them extremely lonely and lead to other conditions such as depression or anxiety.
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Most children with Asperger’s develop an interest in one or two narrow topics. These can be anything from football statistics, to weather reports, to music. They often become such experts in these areas that they become annoyed with anyone who attempts to change the subject or interest them in another topic. Years ago, I treated a woman with Asperger’s who knew every song in every Broadway musical. She would burst into singing for no reason during psychotherapy sessions.
Many people confuse Asperger’s and autism because both can include repetitive movements and rituals. The movements can include rocking back and forth, hand-wringing, twisting fingers or hair, and other eccentric-appearing actions. The Asperger’s children can also experience ritualistic behavior such as having to dress in a certain order, walking home from school a specific route every day, or saying words repetitively.
Since you are the primary caregiver for your grandson, you can educate yourself more about Asperger’s Disorder through the websites of WebMD and The Mayo Clinic. One of the most informative and helpful websites is the “National Institute of Neurological Disorders and Stroke” (www.ninds.nih.gov/disorders/aspergers).
Nancy Ryburn is a psychologist who teaches psychology at Southeast Arkansas College and maintains a limited private practice in Pine Bluff. If you have questions pertaining to mental health, please e-mail them to drnryburn@gmail.com. The questions will not be answered personally, but could appear in a future column. There will be no identifying information listed with the questions and all e-mails remain confidential.